Citizen Smith, cease picking your nose immediately!

Wednesday, April 4. 2007

From the BBC: 'Talking' CCTV scheme expanding

"Talking" CCTV cameras that tell off people dropping litter or committing anti-social behaviour are to be installed in 20 areas across England.

What an appallingly low-tech solution. Surely it would be much more efficient to fit out the new anti-terrorist RFID-enabled identity cards with a simple mechanism which delivers an electric shock to the carrier whenever needed. Anyone seen to be not reacting - presumably as they're not carrying a card - can then be apprehended by a crack council SWAT team and shipped off to Guantanamo.

Posted by Mount Penguin in etc at 09:22 | Comments (12) | Trackbacks (0)

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I predict that the children who win the competition to be the voice of the CCTV camera will spend HOURS doing anti-social things in front of said cameras in order to hear their own voices.

John Reid. Is. On. Crack.

#1 Bowleserised (Homepage) on 2007-04-04 11:11 (Reply)

As a tourist in UK, I see a positive side to this. After a visit of London, I go to the police and ask them to edit a video with the clips where I appear and I don't need to walk around with my clumsy movie camera.

We are living in a very modern time, we might as well enjoy it.

#2 Didier (Homepage) on 2007-04-04 11:37 (Reply)

Bonjour Didier, bienvenue à mon (ma?) blog! (Je regrette que je parle une francais affreux. Mais on peut essayer, n'est ce pas?).

That, I think, is a very good idea. Maybe they could use "Automatic Gait Recognition" ( http://www.gait.ecs.soton.ac.uk/ ) to identify you and automate the process.

#2.1 MountPenguin (Homepage) on 2007-04-04 11:49 (Reply)

Well, Automatic Gait Recognition wouldn't work with me, as I work for the Ministry of silly walks

In french, blog is male, don't aske me why.

#2.1.1 Didier (Homepage) on 2007-04-04 13:32 (Reply)

In German there is much controversy as to whether it is "der Blog" or "das Blog". The dictionaries tend towards "das", in common usage a lot of people seem to prefer "der" (if I hadn't looked it up just now I'd have chosen "der" as well).

#2.1.1.1 MountPenguin (Homepage) on 2007-04-04 22:43 (Reply)

funny, because I've been saying "die Blog" mostly but I do try to mix up all my articles as much as I can to increase my odds of actually (and accidentally) getting them right

#2.1.1.1.1 Ben (Homepage) on 2007-04-05 17:33 (Reply)

But, yes, the general rule is that "foreign" words get stuck with das.

#2.1.1.1.2 Ben (Homepage) on 2007-04-05 17:34 (Reply)

If only it were that easy... The general rule is that the foreign word gets the gender of the word it would be translated as in German, if you see what I mean. So the theory is that "blog" is a contraction of "log" in the sense of "Logbuch", and because it's "das Buch", it should be "das Blog".

(It was great fun working here during the first Internet boom in a room of German academics; endless were the debates as to whether it is "der Link" or "die Link" etc. etc., at least until Duden got their act together and deemed it to be "der Link").

#2.1.1.1.2.1 MountPenguin (Homepage) on 2007-04-05 19:30 (Reply)

Ben, I've also always been a great believer in 'die'. 'Der' is nice too because of its feminine genitive and dative uses as well as masculine singular. 'Dem' is nice, of course, because of the m. I refuse ever to say 'den' or 'des'.

Will these talking cameras be giving any other useful tips? Like telling people what they're wearing doesn't match, or there's a ladder in their tights? That kind of thing? God, isn't England a shit-hole? (Nice too, though, of course.)

#3 BiB (Homepage) on 2007-04-05 18:17 (Reply)

Oh the shame. I put an apostrophe in its. Penguin, if you can edit, please do, or ban me from your site for all eternity.

#4 (illiterate) BiB (Homepage) on 2007-04-06 03:35 (Reply)

BiB, admit it, you got your education at the "School of Greengrocer's English" (Motto: "Apostrophes' ten-a-penny"). I will forgive you this time, but further transgressions will be punished by some act of lexical depravity.

#4.1 MountPenguin (Homepage) on 2007-04-06 09:39 (Reply)

I was almost too scared to open your blog, but 'y'o'u'v'e' saved the day. Thank you!

#5 BiB (Homepage) on 2007-04-06 18:36 (Reply)

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Competition entry by David Cummins powered by Serendipity v1.0

Who,What,FAQ

Who

The Penguin

Mount Penguin is technically British, but has lived in Berlin for like yonks.

What

This is a blog of odd stuff he comes across in everyday life, etc. Bit of a lucky dip really.

FAQ

I did originally intend to put together what one day might be the ultimate Berlin FAQ. Due to global warming that hasn't yet happened, but nevertheless if you have any questions about Berlin, feel free to ask them here and I'll see if I can find an answer...

Meanwhile...

Do come and visit my other blog where there's likely to be more hot penguin action.

Comments

björn about IKEA Shelving Festival!
Thu, 20.11.2008 12:17
Deutschland-Schweden Out of Europe "Best" war ein N ordallianz ml Europa, Russland und Japan (große Kriege [...]

BiB about Penguin's Autumn Sale
Tue, 28.10.2008 15:51
Yes indeedy. There's one tomor row (Wednesday), at Osswald, w hich I'm not sure I can make t hough. But I'll keep you [...]

ThePenguin about Penguin's Autumn Sale
Sat, 25.10.2008 12:05
Until 3rd Nov - any Stammtisch e coming up?

BiB about Penguin's Autumn Sale
Fri, 24.10.2008 01:32
Sir, how long are you here for ?

d.z. bodenberg karlmarxstrasse about Penguin's Autumn Sale
Tue, 21.10.2008 20:45
Dear Mr. Penguin, I think I kn ow someone who could do with t hat chest-of-drawers, and mayb e the fridge. I'll get b [...]

ThePenguin about Notice of Blog Suspension
Fri, 07.03.2008 14:42
I don't know what you're smoki ng, but I'm sure a lot of peop le would be interested to find out.

jollyroger about Notice of Blog Suspension
Fri, 07.03.2008 12:28
HOW DO YOU DO… BEING A BERLIN ER Wanna swastika shaped be er mug? Like climbing walls? Stay in the UK Histo [...]

Mummy Penguin about There's nothing like the taste of home
Sat, 01.03.2008 14:31
I hope the squids and whales d idn't get you. It's March 1st and there is a distinct lack o f blogs.

IsarSteve about There's nothing like the taste of home
Mon, 11.02.2008 12:50
Welcome in your new job as the Japanese Ambassador to Blackp ool... eh lass, let's go üü p tüüer..

MountPenguin about There's nothing like the taste of home
Sun, 10.02.2008 23:11
Hmm, yesterday I went past whe re the whale place was but for got to look out for it. I'll l et you all know in the r [...]

Peter (Blackpool) about There's nothing like the taste of home
Sun, 10.02.2008 23:02
....and hope you enjoy the "sc ientific" whale steaks!.

MountPenguin about Cheesecake at 30,000 feet
Sat, 09.02.2008 21:06
The fish contains soya sauce. You can buy them for a few cen ts at the Asian supermarket in the Alexanderhaus on Al [...]

MountPenguin about Cheesecake at 30,000 feet
Sat, 09.02.2008 21:03
Nope, made the plane - but onl y just due to late departure f rom Tegel (a broken-down airpl ane tug) and Charles de [...]

IsarSteve about Cheesecake at 30,000 feet
Sat, 09.02.2008 01:25
What's in the fish? Is it perhaps Whalemeat juice?? Gathered of course, under "lab oratory conditions" and [...]

BiB about Cheesecake at 30,000 feet
Fri, 08.02.2008 22:26
Nein, nein, no comprendo. Blog ging? From a PLANE? No, you mi ssed the flight, didn't you?